Whole30 Days 4-5

Just a quick little post tonight to catch up here. So far, the Whole30 has been going well. Last night was really the first night that I was just dying for some chocolate. Aside from the first night, last night I really wanted some dark chocolate M&Ms, maybe some dark chocolate squares, some chocolate ice cream. And today when I got home from a meeting that was about 45 minutes too long, I just wanted some wine and to veg out. But I know I'll sleep better tonight and feel better tomorrow not having had either of those two things.

Pretty much though what I was hoping for at least in terms of focus, concentration, and work, the Whole30 has already done what I hoping it would. In terms of my grading and getting the nitty gritty stuff for work done, and grading when the stuff comes in, I've been doing that all week, and getting through it reasonably as well. Now, I still have a lot of prep to do this weekend, so we'll see how that gets done at night after everyone goes to bed and if I can still focus and then still sleep well. I still need to negotiate balance, and food won't do that, but there has already been a marked difference in my being able to have a quick turn around with the grading.

My plan for tomorrow is to sleep until the baby wakes up, go to CF, get back in my pjs, read while she's sleeping, and then veg and relax for the rest of the day, and then Sunday I'll work on organizing things and such.

Despite the cravings, which I expected, and the occasional headache, the first five days have gone very well I think. Here's to the next six and making it past day 10!

Whole30, Day 2-Day3 (yesterday & today)

Yesterday was much more smooth than Day 1. I still really wanted that wine last night. The afternoon went well until the Swee'Pea's ear started hurting her and the squealing began, and we just couldn't get her to settle down (poor baby). It was frustrating in part because I can't just take away the pain, and I had a ton of grading to get through and it was going so well until the meltdown. I know that sounds selfish because it had appeared that I would finish and then be able to enjoy the evening, but baby girl had other plans. At least though we found out this morning it's sinus pressure and teething pain rather than an ear infection.

Usually, this is when I would have grabbed the wine. But since I couldn't have the wine, I had to just deal with the situation rather than taking comfort in the wine, which should be enjoyed rather than reaching for it because the baby is driving me nuts. So it's good to have that thrust upon me. And I just put some kombucha in a wine glass and called it a night (which I know that's the same as eating a Paleo cookie, but oh well). I am happier though that the baby is fine rather than her regular state of illness.

I was really hungry yesterday afternoon, and I did snack. Since I worked out two days in a row, first time in weeks, which is its own adjustment, I should have accounted for that, but it was ok. I made up for it at dinner.

Recap:

• I didn't sleep quite as well last night as the night before, but even though I tossed and turned a little bit, mostly due to the dog sleeping on me, I still woke up before my alarm this morning, and I woke up feeling rested. 
• Even though I was rested, I did still feel tired, but not like I could've have kept sleeping. It was weird to be rested and tired at the same time. And I was very very sore from the last two day's workouts, and after reading the Whole30 Day 3 daily email about Day 3 tiredness and taking it easy on the workouts, that confirmed my decision to take an off day today. Four days this week at CF will be plenty for my return and for week 1.
• I woke up with a headache this morning, which I guess is par for the course, especially for Day 3. So I'm trying to pound the water. Mom is actually doing much worse on this front today than I am, but I am doing surprisingly well. Tonight I get baby monitor duty, so we'll see how I sleep tonight and how I feel tomorrow.
• Like Monday night, falling asleep has been much easier. And I'm tired at night. I feel like already this is making a marked difference in my sleep.

Here are some other things from the last couple of days that are unusual which I attribute already to the Whole30:

• Concentration is way up. Even when I'm in a rush to prep for class and I have to skim what I'm teaching (stuff I've read multiple times. Fear not; I'm not that much of a slacker.) I feel like I can focus better already.
• This is the first time this quarter I'm caught up on work. I can't even believe it! Even with Swee'Pea throwing a wrench in my grading plans yesterday afternoon, I was still able to finish the grading (probably, too, because I didn't have wine!), got the grades calculated and gave them back to the students when I said I would. And because I had two days of good food in my system, I was seriously just able to sit down and get it done. And that was after getting all of my grading done on Monday. I was hoping that this would fall into place like that. 
• This is also the first time this quarter that I don't feel behind or stressed. And when I'm done with this post I'll actually be able to work on getting a little bit ahead. That means that tomorrow's office hours are open to get the papers that come in tomorrow knocked out. 
• I honestly just do not feel as manic or stressed right now either. And I'm glad that I'm caught up because I am very much looking forward to just vegging with the folks tonight. Day 3 is a good night to rest up!

I am not anticipating a "kill all the things" day tomorrow--perhaps because I had several of those last week, but we'll see. Day 4 is about as notorious as Day 10/11, but in all honesty, I feel like it's going much better so far than I anticipated. I'm expecting some rough patches, but I'm hopeful and pleased thus far.

Whole30 Day 1

I survived Day 1. Barely though. I forgot that I had started and almost bought some Reese's buttercups at the store. And last night all I could think was, "oooh, some M&Ms would be the perfect follow up to this dinner!"And I had had a really long day and just wanted some wine. It was my first day back at CF after three weeks, and the baby was fussy, and I was exhausted and still had all of this work to do, and I was just like, "well, maybe I'll restart tomorrow. I want some wine. I *need* some wine." But I did not give in, which felt notable in and of itself, so I had some kombucha instead.

Already some things I've noticed:

• Last night, for the first time in weeks, perhaps even months, I was not wired when I went to bed. Actually, I fell asleep twice while I was reading and trying to prep for class--not good for work, but clearly the cortisol levels were where they should have been in the evening. I think part of that had to do with working out for the first time in weeks as well, but in all honesty, it felt sooooooo good to be tired at 8:30 and not totally wired and pumped up. 
• I also slept really really well. Granted, my parents had the baby monitor (we're alternating nights so that if she does get up, I don't have more than one sleepless/interrupted night at a time as I have been sick and so I don't relapse), but I woke up only because I was hot, shortly after I fell asleep, but had no trouble falling back asleep. I woke up a bit earlier than I wanted to, and before my alarm went off, and while that extra time would have been nice, I wasn't like "oh, I want 10 more hours of sleep!" I felt fairly rested this morning.

Tonight though might be a different story because I get the baby monitor tonight. The meal plan for the week is made. My timing for breakfast was off this morning, but I did have some eggs, and I did manage to get lunch in before class, so I should be good.

Yesterday's meals, fyi, if you're curious:
Breakfast: Poached eggs, sweet potato
Lunch: Chicken salad, salad greens with oil and balsamic vinegar, grapes
Dinner: Buffalo chicken salad (Well Fed 2--AMAZING!)

Today, thus far and on deck:
Breakfast: Poached eggs, grapes
Lunch: see yesterday (I tend to eat the same things for long stretches for breakfast and lunch. I don't really get bored; if I do, I mix it up with leftovers. Right now, convenience and ease and planning are key)
Dinner: Thai Basil Beef, cauliflower rice (Well Fed 2--I'm sure it will be amazing)

Poached eggs are my new favorite thing, and having them on top of sweet potatoes is the perfect breakfast right now. I need to add an orange or something in there, but it works for me.

And coffee, as always, is black.

I'm pretty tired right now at lunch, but this morning's workout was a beast, especially after a three week absence. My CF goals are M-Th, Saturdays. I'd like to return to a five day a week routine. All in all though, I feel a bit clearer, and no hangover yet.

Gotta jet to class now. Here's to a successful day 2!

Whole30 Pre-Game

I discovered the culprit behind the stomach troubles. This. Sadly. But, even though I'm a distributor, it does go to show that one should rely on real, whole food, not supplements and the like, though there are vitamins in there, too. I'm a big fan of most of this stuff, but the challenge thing did not work for me. So for a week I've thought I've had the stomach flu which has kept me from my workouts. Double whamy.

I'm sort of pre-gaming here with the Whole30. I'm excited about giving it another go. I'm excited about getting myself closer to optimal capacity here, but I still want to be able to have my king cake and eat it too until then. My meals from now until Monday will basically be Whole30 meals, but with dinner wine and king cake. And I'll enjoy my lattes until then, too.

I am hopeful.

Additionally, I'm hopeful that getting everything else in place will help with my professional and financial goals, actually. If I can think and focus and not have to reread stuff and get the grading done when it comes in and can focus on it, then that frees up time to get my writing done. And I've got two new preps including a grad class next quarter, so I need to be able to focus. Financially, when I'm feeling good, I'm less likely to mindlessly buy things and spend money in an attempt to be happy or look pretty or something. Plus, we need a minivan and we need to own our own house here, and we need one with more room than what we have now. Especially if there are more children in our future.

I'm also excited about reviving this blog, too. I have found that aside from the time I get to spend with my daughter, I'm truly at my happiest when I'm writing something, anything. And I need to make that happen consistently and be the focus of my life.

Whole30-ing like my life depends on it!

My poor little Paleo blog here. Let me dust off the cobwebs and give her another run.

The Whole Life Challenge was a success even though I didn't get to officially *finish* it by doing the final workout because of a brown recluse spider bite that resulted in surgery and a giant hole in my leg for nearly two weeks, but which sidelined me for nearly three. And twice already since the start of the year have I attempted to go back to CrossFit, but have been sidelined both times by the baby's sickness (including an ER trip and a hospital stay), and then for me a head cold, turned mild flu (three solid days in bed) turned stomach virus something or other. We're now working on week 3 again of being out CrossFit.

It's disheartening. Frustrating. And depressing.

Since the baby has been sick and I've been sick, even trying to do the Advocare 24 Day Challenge, I've been straight up stress eating (not doing the stomach virus any favors here either). At least I recognize that I'm stress eating. It's not stopping me from doing it, and I know that it is feeding into my depression here, too. And I feel like crap. I'm not going to complain about it, but I know exactly why I feel terrible, but I'm stuck in this place I can't get out of.

I'm giving myself the rest of the week to mope and try to get to CrossFit and try to get some sleep and catch up on work, and then Monday I'm starting a Whole30. And I'm doing it as if my life depended on it. Honestly, right now, I feel it sort of does. I feel like the Whole Life Challenge would have been much more beneficial and kept me closer to the straight and narrow during the holidays had I not had to be on the elimination diet for a month, been sick, had surgery, and had a baby that was sick and not sleeping. Not that I'm trying to make excuses here. But I know that my health right now, my whole health, hinges on what I'm fueling my body with. I know, from trial and error, that 95% clean paleo is optimal for my body. I know others can get away with an 80/20 or 85/15 plan--my husband and father are like that. For me, it needs to be a bit cleaner more consistently.

I'll be chronicling the Whole30 journey; I'm shooting for a day by day recap (probably the morning after).

My body/system is a mess. I'm a long way from where I began back in June of 2012.  Here's what I'm struggling with now that I'm hoping (and which I'm confident) the Whole30 is going to help with:

• Sickness/stomach issues. I've been sick a lot since I got pregnant Oct. 2012. I know part of that was pregnancy related. And I know that another part of it is lack of sleep because I have an infant who did not start sleeping through the night until about a week ago (she's 7 months old). However, given all of these factors, a better diet would mitigate the intensity and duration of illness, or at least that's what I'm hoping for. And if I can remain healthy, then I won't be passing that along to the baby or won't be as susceptible to her passing colds along to me. And I'm tired of taking tums every night, multiple times a night.
• Sleep. Part of my getting sick was that I didn't sleep. And even though the baby has been sleeping better and more consistently now, my sleep isn't good because I've been sick and have had stomach aches. I've also had trouble getting to sleep, so I've been staying up later but not feeling rested even after 8 hours of sleep. This affects my health and ability to make it to my workouts in the morning.
• Not being able to work out, mainly because of the above two issues and I just feel like crap.
• Depression. And major PMS. When I first started Paleo, one thing I noticed almost immediately was how much less depressed I was and that my PMS disappeared. Gluten literally makes me sad. And honestly, lately, I'm almost at the point to where I'm about to start having trouble functioning. I find myself also really resentful and jealous of everyone else, and I really hate that feeling.
• Concentration/ability to get my work done quickly. Grading just sits on my desk and stockpiles. I'm NEVER like that with grading. I collect it, grade it, hand it back usually within 48 hours. This academic year? Not so much. Reading and prep takes me forever. And I find it hard to even remember really what I have been reading. Not so great for having to teach novels and such.
• Aches. I just ache. My body aches. I feel middle aged. I don't like that. At all.
• Skin/hair/nails. Skin is not bad yet. My nails are in terrible shape. My hair is losing its luster again. I don't like that at all.
• Stressed. I feel stressed, like I can't keep up with anything, like I'm constantly working and unable to spend as much time with my baby as I'd like. I don't feel like I have time for anything. I want to write. I can't seem to make time for that. Every thing is a push and a rush and a trial. I don't even have time to cook properly because I think of all the other things that need to get done. I hate that.

There you go. I know that all of those are intimately related.  I'm hoping that when one falls into place that hopefully the rest of the things will begin to slowly fall into place as well.

I'm excited about the next month. Having done this before (only once successfully though), I know how hard it can be, but I know how wonderful the other side is, too. While it is true that I hope that this will help get the rest of the baby weight (or a significant amount) and inches off, honestly, since I have at least one pair of jeans and one pair of pants that fit and some dresses, it's not my primary concern. My adjusted goal for that is at least by Swee'Pea's first birthday to be back in the pre-pregnancy summer clothes (because I won't be able to afford new clothes this summer!). And if I can remain healthy and reign my issues in, it shouldn't be a problem.

So here's to good meals with some wine and king cake for the rest of the week, cabinet and fridge cleaning, meal prep and condiment making this weekend, and an enthusiastic Whole30 start on Monday. I can't wait!